Yeah I know I was supposed to be on this Joint but I had some business to take care of… Without further ado here’s the 2013 Loyola Rap Cypher:
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Lying to the Person You Love Most
I’ve been doing something I said I would never do. I’ve been lying to my daughter about Santa Claus, the Easter bunny, and the tooth fairy. You know what else? I don’t feel bad about it. Firstly, (not sure if firstly is a word, but don’t judge me) I’m not really lying by commission, I’m lying by omission. I’m not telling her that there is a Santa Claus or Easter Bunny, I’m just not refuting the fact either. Mainly because I don’t want to crush her little dreams and happiness. Just because I had a bitter, mostly Christmas-less child- hood does not mean that she should also. When Christmas rolls around I always tell her as I let her open a gift “look what daddy got you”, or “look what mommy bought.” Sort of subliminally letting her know that Santa didn’t have jack to do with her presents.
Secondly, I am losing the war of parenting and marriage (like most men.) because as many times as I purposely try to omit the existence of a Santa Claus her mother is saying “Santa is coming” or “what is Santa going to bring you?” I can’t just step in and say, “Santa is going to bring you shit!” Because then I am the bad guy, and no parent wants to be the bad guy. So I’m stuck between a rock and a fictional hard place.
Third (is there a thirdly? and if there isn’t, then I guess I can’t use Secondly), so …Thirdly I am one of those awful Christians who does not go to Church often. I’ve been stuck between churches ever since I moved down to New Orleans. I either do not like a church, most of the ones I’ve been to, or I like it but it is too far to be practical. I digress, I still like to harp on the idea that Christmas should be about God/ Jesus (nevermind the whole not being born in the winter argument, lets save that for a later date) and so should Easter. In some ways I feel like the Bunny takes away from the sanctity of the holiday. On the other hand, there are atheists out there who would analogize my believe in God to my daughter’s belief in Santa/ Easter Bunny. To those guys I say: “Fuck You Buddy!!” I already said I wasn’t a very good Christian.
Fourthly (that sounds plain stupid) my daughter watches entirely too much television. This is MY FAULT. The television is a big promoter of the Santa Claus/ Easter Bunny agenda. It is why my daughter’s attention span sucks. (It is also part of the reason why she began speaking and counting at an early age.) It is hard to tell a Toddler no this isn’t real when every t.v. show she watches has a holiday episode that NEVER speaks about religion but features a heavy dose of SC/EB. (I can abbreviate Santa Claus and Easter Bunny without introducing them, I’m good like that.) You can’t say “Merry Christmas” anymore, it seems. Even “happy Holidays” seems to be headed for a downfall. pretty soon we will be limited to either “Happy Gift Giving Day” or “Happy see members of your Spouse’s family which you hate day”. When my daughter gets older she can be whatever religion/ non religion she wants but while she lives in my house she will be a Judeo/Christian/ respecter of Muslims.
Mostly, I want to raise a nice respectable young lady, who does not end up as a stripper. If believing in Santa means that you keep your clothes on while talking to strange men, by all means, believe in him until you die. The only thing that irks me more than this whole Holiday lie situation is the inevitable birds and the bees. talk…
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@Royal_u_g and @felonious_funk talking about #Ratchet pick up lines
Te’o Soap Opera Continues
This Te’o shit is getting deeper and uglier. So now the dude who was perpertrating as a woman, and Catfished (you like how I used that as a verb hunh) Manti Te’o is saying that he may have been in love with Te’o.
The first of McGraw’s two-part interview with Tuiasosopo will air Thursday on the “Dr. Phil” show. McGraw appeared Wednesday morning on NBC’s “Today” show, which aired two clips of the Tuiasosopo interview.
“There were many times when Manti and Lennay have broken up,” Tuiasosopo said, “but something would bring them back together, whether it was something going on in his life or Lennay’s life or in this case my life.”
McGraw said Tuiasosopo told him he fell deeply in love with Te’o and that for Tuiasosopo it was a romantic relationship.
“Here we have a young man that fell deeply, romantically in love,” McGraw told NBC. “I asked him straight up, ‘Was this a romantic relationship with you?’ And he says yes. I said, ‘Are you then therefore gay?’ And he said, ‘When you put it that way, yes.’ And then he caught himself and said ‘I am confused.’ ”
McGraw told NBC that Te’o “absolutely, unequivocally” wasn’t involved in the hoax.
One theory for the hoax is that Te’o was trying to cover up a homosexual relationship. In her TV interview with Te’o last week, Katie Couric asked him if he was gay.
“No, far from it,” he said. “Faaaaarrrr from it.”
Tuiasosopo told McGraw that as Te’o became more famous he knew that the online hoax he started more than two years ago was going to blow up.
Tuiasosopo said: “I wanted to end it because after everything I had gone through I finally realized that I just had to move on with my life and had to get … you know, my real me, Ronaiah … I just had to start living and let this go.”
McGraw said he spent time with Tuiasosopo and his parents.
“Ronaiah had a number of life experiences that damaged this young man in some very serious ways,” he said.
read the rest of this ESPN article here
read another article that I wrote about the Te’o soap opera here
Doesn’t Measure Up
So, recently someone measured a Subway sandwich and found out it doesn’t measure up. The foot longs (12 inches in a foot) are really only eleven. Subway counteracted by claiming the bread wasnt cooked to their specifications. That statement didn’t cut it so they went to the legal jargon saying “footlong” is a product description and not a measurement. Now everyone is “Subwaying” – taking photos of their sandwich next to a ruler, yard stick, measuring tape.
These photos are a Quiznos ad in the making. The biggest part of this in my opinion is the reaction from Subway. We all know when McDonald’s says quarter pound or Angus 1/3rd pound the fine print says precooked patty weight.
For Subway to come out at first and try to say that that particular sandwich wasn’t up to standard was a low blow and they had to know other people would measure up. On the other hand, if they give you an extra inch of bread, their meat already comes in predetermined selections ( 4 meatballs for a “footlong” 2 for a 6 inch.) Is it really that big a deal? @Royal_U_G 1royalradio.com
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