Lying to the Person You Love Most

I’ve been doing something I said I would never do. I’ve been lying to my daughter about Santa Claus, the Easter bunny, and the tooth fairy. You know what else? I don’t feel bad about it. Firstly, (not sure if firstly is a word, but don’t judge me) I’m not really lying by commission,  I’m lying by omission. I’m not telling her that there is a Santa Claus or Easter Bunny, I’m just not refuting the fact either. Mainly because I don’t want to crush her little dreams and happiness. Just because I had a bitter, mostly Christmas-less child- hood does not mean that she should also. When Christmas rolls around I always tell her as I let her open a gift “look what daddy got you”, or “look what mommy bought.” Sort of subliminally letting her know that Santa didn’t have jack to do with her presents. santa_claus_doesnt_exist_post_cards-rcbcbf0b3eaa549d9b427da7f0eb47727_vgbaq_8byvr_512

Secondly, I am losing the war of parenting and marriage (like most men.) because as many times as I purposely try to omit the existence of a Santa Claus her mother is saying “Santa is coming” or “what is Santa going to bring you?” I can’t just step in and say, “Santa is going to bring you shit!” Because then I am the bad guy, and no parent wants to be the bad guy. So I’m stuck between a rock and a fictional hard place. 34972463

Third (is there a thirdly? and if there isn’t, then I guess I can’t use Secondly), so …Thirdly I am one of those awful Christians who does not go to Church often. I’ve been stuck between churches ever since I moved down to New Orleans. I either do not like a church, most of the ones I’ve been to, or I like it but it is too far to be practical. I digress, I still like to harp on the idea that Christmas should be about God/ Jesus (nevermind the whole not being born in the winter argument, lets save that for a later date) and so should Easter. In some ways I feel like the Bunny takes away from the sanctity of the holiday. On the other hand, there are atheists out there who would analogize my believe in God to my daughter’s belief in Santa/ Easter Bunny. To those guys I say: “Fuck You Buddy!!” I already said I wasn’t a very good Christian.santa_vs_god

Fourthly (that sounds plain stupid) my daughter watches entirely too much television. This is MY FAULT. The television is a big promoter of the Santa Claus/ Easter Bunny agenda. It is why my daughter’s attention span sucks. (It is also part of the reason why she began speaking and counting at an early age.) It is hard to tell a Toddler no this isn’t real when every t.v. show she watches has a holiday episode that NEVER speaks about religion but features a heavy dose of SC/EB. (I can abbreviate Santa Claus and Easter Bunny without introducing them, I’m good like that.) You can’t say “Merry Christmas” anymore, it seems. Even “happy Holidays” seems to be headed for a downfall. pretty soon we will be limited to either “Happy Gift Giving Day” or “Happy see members of your Spouse’s family which you hate day”. When my daughter gets older she can be whatever religion/ non religion she wants but while she lives in my house she will be a Judeo/Christian/ respecter of Muslims.


Mostly, I want to raise a nice respectable young lady, who does not end up as a stripper. If believing in Santa means that you keep your clothes on while talking to strange men, by all means, believe in him until you die. The only thing that irks me more than this whole Holiday lie situation is the inevitable birds and the bees. talk…

Heauxs be Winning

I’ve been doing a lot of thinking about a subject near and dear to my heart: heauxs. More specifically sex, materialism, and compensation. I won’t get too deep into my illustrious past but I’ve had some escapades. I’ve been called the “H” word before. BUT I’ve never been specifically paid for services . I can say the same for most of my brothers in arms. For the most part the only compensation any of us have gotten is a fair exchange. In some cases, a good story or some gas money at best. Any number of women would have called us heauxs in that pre- settling down period. On the other hand, We live in a culture that promotes actual prostitution. Even ordinary women want to be “tipped” and what’s worse nobody’s is condemning this. So the question I have for women is, how can you call men heauxs for trying to have as much sex as possible just because they like it, yet not say anything when you know you have a friend/sister/ acquaintance who is having sex for, heels, bills, and Benzes? The question I have for men is, why aren’t we getting more out of this exchange? #weighin


Mind on Mississippi

Mind on Mississippi Can’t say I’m anxious can’t say I’m worried  Can’t say nothing sweet can’t say something mean  So burdened I feel buried  When I get there will things change  Will you change   we still speak  When I get home will it work out  Will I workout will I still sleep  Will I eat way too much to cover unhappiness Will the kids respect me  Will they add a sir after yes  Will we find a new car  Have we paid taxes on this new address Getting home supposed to be a relief  What if it add stress What if we argue, what if I’m mean What if we can’t adjust what’ll it seem  Like to a little girl who’s barely old enough for pigtails  Will we show love will she grow up and feel compelled To call  text write and visit Or will she avoid me just like I did it  With my own mom  Will she call me dad in her own time  Will she realize I did this for her  Or appreciate that I was just blur  A distant memory instead of the father figure I was meant to be  Will she even remember me  Where will I work what will I do  will I survive ok just going to school What do I say to this kids that’s not my age That don’t know my life or why I’m this way  Or why I’m so old how I haven’t finished my degree yet Tell em Im sticking to the script  when they don’t know  What they want to be yet I never been a loser and I dnt plan to start  Just wait and hang on and see what I do with this

Fresno Pacific Player Naked Rampage

Leonard Young allegedly returned to his apartment about an hour after getting the boot and proceeded to get drunk and tear the place up. He then took off all of his clothes (uh, why?) and ran through the neighboring streets naked before ending up at a convenience store, where he pounded on the bulletproof glass windows. In the parking lot outside, he then assaulted two women and knocked one of them to the ground. At that point, police arrived and tried to subdue Young. But he jumped into the front seat of their car, put it in drive, and attempted to pull off. In an effort to stop him from driving away, one of the responding officers shot his Taser at Young once, twice, and then a third time—but it didn’t faze him. They finally managed to pry his hands free from the car’s steering wheel by beating one of his wrists with a flashlight (Note to self: Don’t make fun of cops equipped with flashlights anymore!) but not before a police dog bit Young and was then subsequently punched in the face by him. Finally, they handcuffed him and took him down to the station.


Pay Off

I get down sometimes because I’m my hardest critic even before I look to say something about others. So I’ll be the first to say that my momma raised me better than I act at times.(Momma told me to speak like I got a college degree- J. Cole) I have to credit that with why I haven’t gone off the deep end. Especially when I see how many lames, marks, tricks, skips, scabs, and scallywags are out here living it up. You know those times you realize that you work too damn hard and the bum you just gave a dollar to hops into a benz and uses your dollar for toll money? That’s how I’ve been feeling lately. I’m sure that’s how a J. Cole or a Wale feels when they can give you a classic mixtape and they turn on the radio and Solja Boy or Waka Flocka (yeah, I know Wale did a song with him but it was the hottest verse on the song) gets played every 7 minutes. It has to hurt. But right when you feel like all these shady, crooked, half way illiterate MFers are doing way better than you just remember they caught your boy Qaddafi in a sewer. The U.S. claimed he had BILLIONS embezzled. That’s Oprah money. Swizz Beats/ Alicia Keys money gets you an African village and he supposedly had Oprah money and was caught in a sewer? No matter. That just goes to show when you are doing the wrong thing whether for 42 minutes or 42 YEARS like Qaddafi it will come back to you. Vice versa if you stay focused and do what you are supposed to do, even if it takes long, the grind will pay off.

T.R.O.Y. to T. M.C.A.Y.


(They Make Careers After You)

I wish Hip Hop was a place where we honored our dead more than just saying “R.I.P. B.I.G., P.A.C., Aaliyah, Left E.Y.E.” (classic Cassidy freestyle).

Case in point, had the Notorious B.I.G. been able to put out at least another classic album, would Jay-Z even have been able to rise to the level which he did? Right now you have competition between rappers who really can be considered the best out of their region or city Common or Kanye? Common or Lupe? The Game or Jay Rock? T.I. or Jeezy? Lil Wayne or Jay Electronica? But that’s because all of their counterparts are still living. It’s hard to make GOAT comparisons between an artist who put out 2 classic albums but never really got to see his full Potential to one who has put out 11 solid albums (3 classics) and building sports bars in airports and endorsing HP computers. You could never compare the Game and Tupac because they never went head to head and it can be argued that one would not have a career w/o the other. I’m convinced that Pitbull would not be the top selling Latino artist if Big Pun had been a little healthier, and we wouldn’t be forced to endure his brand of salsa rave music.
Ironically, some artists do realize that their careers are not just influenced by but created by the opportunistic gap left by our fallen pioneers. I love me some Ciara, I don’t know bout making a whole song bout her like Wayne or Trey Songz…. ok yeah I know, but her brand would have had a much harder time elevating to where it is if Aaliyah were still around. Likewise Destiny’s Child might not have ascended if TLC had had a great comeback album, and maybe Chili would be the hottest chic in the Game wearing the chain. More so than getting on Tupac’s 75th posthumous album or Diddy presents Gorilla Black, a shaved Rick Ross, that kid from the Notorious movie and Fat Joe painted in black face as The Black Frank White Quartet there needs to be a premier video showcasing of the talents and the lives of these great artists and stop letting kids think that this blood sacrifice B.S. is why Dame Dash is the divorced proud owner of a failed networking site, a label that boasted Currensy as its “premier” artist and a brand newish 2008 Jeep Commander.



Do You know what it is to have a REAL significant other? A good woman is not necessarily everything you want. A good woman is everything you are not. I Love my woman. She’s not my boo, or my girl, or my baby momma, she is my wife. I appreciate that because it takes a lot to be a wife. But it takes God to be a good wife. So I ask, do you know what it is to have a REAL significant other?

Racism or Ignorance? pt. 2


I try to keep this blog dedicated to my first love, music, as much as possible. However one of my favorite pastimes is obviously niggerishness. I was quite amused by the advent of the Monkey Gang and I might shit myself at an all- white party if this turns out to be a real group bent on rapping about “selling more crack than you”. Culturally, I dnt know if this has any potential to be anymore dangerous than Baracka Flocka Flames but you never know.  While I was partaking of the Monkey Gang trailer, look it up if you haven’t seen it, I came across the story of Reggae artist Vybez Kartel bleaching his skin and then blaming cake soap, then coming out with a song called cake soap and releasing his own brand of cake soap. I’m all for monetary schemes that are at least feasible but what happens when all these ppl buy it and still remain the same color? Vybez tried to compare his bleaching to white people’s tanning, which at best is a stretch. Almost immediately after I got a knock at the door, which turned out to be Jehovah’s Witnesses. Being a semi somewhat good Christian I didn’t slam the door in their face but Lord knows I wanted to. After they left I realized that I had never seen a white Jehovah’s Witness, and besides that one girl that stabbed me with a nail file, I have never seen a Black Mormon. Which makes me wonder are there really separate but equal things that different races share in common? Because to be honest, with both Mormons and Witnesses I dnt know what their faith says I just know we don’t believe it and they both knock on your door and leave you pamphlets which you never read, but promise you will.#weighin… is it ok for there to be race divides like bleaching/ tanning and Mormon/ Jehovah’s witnesses? Am I just a fool and there are a wealth of liteskin Black people tanning and going to Mormon Temple and coming home to their white Jehovah’s Witness significant other?